Query SQLite Through Third-party "proxy" With Laravel Eloquent

I am attempting to query (manipulation optional) a SQLite database using Laravel Eloquent. A driver already exists for this an is delightfully easy to use.

However, the database is remote and part of a video game. The game supports RCON which allows me to send commands and in this case, I can send SQL statements.

My current state:

1. Send a SQL statement prefixed with "sql" to remote machine via third party library:

sql SELECT id, level, guild, isAlive FROM characters

2. Receive a line delimited string, prefixed by record number:

     id |  level |  guild |  isAlive |
#0 1183 |     14 |     60 |        1 |
#1  636 |     10 |     60 |        1 |
#2   41 |     30 |     60 |        1 |
#3   47 |     27 |     60 |        1 |
#4   49 |     38 |     60 |        1 |
#5  403 |     32 |     60 |        1 |
#6   50 |     31 |     60 |        1 |
#7 1389 |     44 |     60 |        1 |

3. Parse the output line by line in a particularly unsavory method and manually assign them to a custom built model/class.

I would really like to incorporate Eloquent in any capacity rather than use my own custom classes. As I typed this post out, I realized I don't believe I'll be able to "piggy back" off of the existing SQLite driver and this would likely be a completely new driver altogether.

However, to those more experienced than myself, do you have any suggestions or methods of approaching this situation?

Ultimately I ended up processing the output of the RCON command. The downside is that it is particularly static. I have to build around things like the columns being selected with the SQL statement and adjusting the results to proper types.

I am using https://github.com/gorcon/rcon-cli and wrapped a query class around it:

class RconDatabase
{
    const RCON_EXECUTABLE = __DIR__ . '/../bin/rcon';

    public function __construct()
    {

    }

    public function query($sql)
    {
        if (!is_executable(self::RCON_EXECUTABLE)) throw new FilePermissionException('Unable to execute RCON');

        $cmd = self::RCON_EXECUTABLE.' -a '.Config::get('rcon.host').':'.Config::get('rcon.port').' -p '.Config::get('rcon.password').' -c "sql '. $sql .'"';
        $output = shell_exec($cmd);

        if ($output == null) throw new RconConnectionException('No response from RCON server');
        if (strpos($output, 'authentication failed') !== false) throw new RconAuthenticationException();
        if (strpos($output, 'dial tcp') !== false) throw new RconNetworkException();

        $lines = preg_split("/((\r?\n)|(\r\n?))/", $output);

        $results = array();
        $last_column = 0;
        for ($i = 0; $i < count($lines); $i++) {
            if (empty($lines[$i])) continue;

            $columns = str_getcsv($lines[$i], '|');

            for ($x = 0; $x < count($columns); $x++) {
                if ($i == 0 && empty($columns[$x])) {
                    $last_column = $x;
                    continue;
                }

                if ($x == 0 && preg_match('/^#[0-9]+\s+(\S+)/', $columns[0], $match))
                    $columns[$x] = $match[1];

                $columns[$x] = trim($columns[$x]);
            }

            if ($i == 0) continue;

            if ($last_column > 0) unset($columns[$last_column]);

            array_push($results, $columns);
        }

        return $results;
    }
}